Keep Your Head Down

I've decided that whenever I walk anywhere at school from now on, I'm going to stare at the ground, exactly 3 feet in front of my feet.

I've been getting in the most uncomfortable eye-contact/greeting situations with people recently. As many of you know, handled poorly, a greeting can leave you walking away thinking, "WTF did I just say/do/gesture?!"

These situations are only exacerbated by the fact that in college, you tend to have a lot of acquaintances- people that deserve a nice greeting but maybe not a phone call. You never know how these acquaintances will react to a "hello", or how they will react to a non-greeting.

However, if you don't see the person (i.e. you are staring at the ground), you can't be at fault. Maybe I'm reading into this a bit too much, but at least I won't be tripping on any unexpected obstructions in the paths of Vassar College.

IMDb gives movies a 7.5? Err, no

I came across this really funny article from The Onion, the satire news paper/online site. If you don't know anything about Pitchfork Media, it is a music website that has interviews, reviews, music news, etc. Their reviews (which include a score from 1-10) are notably elitist, which has caused a lot of people to disregard their rating system. However, whenever they give a rating over 8.0, everyone takes notice.

It is rating systems like this that make me appreciate IMBd's rating system even more- which is based on total user votes. It is however, nice to read an actual review and not just the number associated with it, which IMDb does not provide. In theory, you could therefore disagree with what the reviewer wrote and consequently their rating, instead of taking the number rating at face value. Either way, satire is funny and the Onion does it really well.

Gyms are a great place to pick up girls? I must disagree

I have read, in numerous reputable periodicals, that the gym is a great place to meet/pick up members of the opposite sex. While I must concede that a gym has a higher percentage of attractive, in-shape people than say, a Wal-Mart, I would argue it is one of the most awkward, uncomfortable places to even talk to another human being.

After observing my local Planet Fitness for the past month, here are my top five reasons why this is the case:

5) It is nearly impossible to judge age outside of any indicating context (non-gym attire, etc.). Women are all over the board on this one- it doesn't help that my only chances lie within the 18-22 age range.
4) Everyone is on a different schedule: you're not going to interrupt someone half way into their stairmaster routine are you? Mid crunch? No. If the stars align and you end up leaving the gym at the same time as another person, that is basically your only shot.
3) The guy next to you is lifting twice as much. A real confidence booster.
2) Starting a conversation inevitably comes across as creepy. I mean the only thing you have in common at that moment is that you are working out. Don't even think about mentioning how long the woman has been on the treadmill, calories burned, weight loss goals, etc. And I've heard form advice is a no-no.
1) People generally look like shit when they are sweating, grunting, or generally exerting themselves in any way. Definitely not conducive to attraction, at least in my book.

However, there is hope: Whole Foods. That store is full of attractive, (seemingly) single women. Also, there is so much more you can talk about at a grocery store than at a gym. Unfortunately, the women I saw there were mainly between 28 and 40, so I'll save that one for the future.

Movie Update

Here are a few more movies (and their ratings) I got a chance to see over break:

Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber of Fleet Street: 8/10
Notes: I was really surprised how much I enjoyed this movie. Johnny Depp was great as always.

Atonement: 7/10
Notes: The storyline was a little boring but was redeemed by the directing style and the fact that Kiera Knightly is so hot.

The Lives of Others: 8/10

I'm still waiting to see There Will Be Blood, which apparently doesnt come out in Maine until the 18th. It's getting crazy good reviews.

Why I Now Hate GPS Units and How They Will Lead to the End of the Human Race

You know those portable GPS things that people use to get places they are unfamiliar with? Well, they need to be destroyed. I just returned from a trip to Montreal with some friends and unfortunately we were at the mercy of one of these units.

Here are some of the things I blame this machine for: 1) it made us take the craziest route to the border which must have been completely based on distance and not road condition, speed limit, potential for fatal accident, etc. 2) The border checkpoint we were guided to is probably the least used checkpoint in the eastern half of the US-Canada border- as a result the entire car was searched, we were detained for 5 hours, and then denied entrance into Canada (this had something to do with illegal knives in the glove compartment). 3) When we finally got to Montreal it led us to the other Prince Arthur St. just to add a bit of insult to injury. 4) On the drive home, in the worst driving conditions I had ever seen due to snow, the route we were forced to follow went straight through the White Mountains in New Hampshire which was probably the most dangerous stretch of road around. That drive took at least 2 years off of my life, thanks GPS.

Why not just get directions from Mapquest or someone who has driven to Montreal before? The answer is simple: we had the GPS. We were invincible. It uses satellites, which seems more foolproof than Mapquest at least. Thats the reason these things are so dangerous- they give you a false sense of security and do not require any prior knowledge of the places you are driving through.

I hope to never own such a device. The more people use them, the lower the world's total knowledge of directions will be- if we all use GPS this theoretically won't be a problem, assuming the technology becomes affordable for more people.

Admittedly, GPS can be helpful in certain situations. The devices are pretty much digital phone books, containing names, numbers, and addresses of local businesses which can be very helpful. Also, if you have absolutely no clue where you are, they will get you to your destination (it just may not be the fastest or least headache-inducing). Basically, the thought of taking orders from a machine scares me.